Friday, November 26, 2010

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Chapter 24 - Without him

The days passed without incident and a sense of normalcy turned back on. Of course, missing Edward me insane, because even though our meetings were always marked by explosive fights and heated arguments, it was passionate and alive. Now I felt empty inside and numb. It was not that I fell in pain, I could not allow me at all. It was more that everything splashed quietly to himself.

The leadership of the dinner was easier for me with every day that Alice and Rose supported me where they could. If I had questions, I turned to Edward's assistant, a very lovely white-haired gentleman who stood by me to help. At first I was embarrassed when I asked him for help, but it took me all the negative feelings, with a friendly and quiet kind Every night after I brought Danny to bed, I crammed like crazy economics to at least be familiar with the basics and even accounts lost after some intense meetings with Benton their terror. In general, he was getting more and more to my confidant and friend. Maybe it was because it represented my last link to Edward, although he never said a word about him. He was really the discretion in person! Edward is not reported at all. It almost seemed as if he had deleted me from his memory and his life.

How would be our next meeting? If he were just as distant and cold, as in his last mail, or would I see him no more, perhaps. There was indeed no reason for him to attend the dinner again. Benton could do it for him and report his report, he would not need more to come near me. All the time I wanted anything else and now that he finally yielded to my wishes fit, I'm not. Sighing, I rose from my office chair and stretched. It was time to forget him at last. I decided to get out and look after things, and above all, to me, Cynthia's work to look at.

After careful consideration and to the dismay of all, I decided to hire them. There was something so touching helpless in themselves and yet it was one of the nicest and hardest-working women who had ever met me. Especially our older customers were able to appreciate their quiet, reserved manner. Your trial period ran from tomorrow and I had to decide now final.

She served just an old lady her morning coffee and chatted briefly with her, what good deed of the lady obviously, because she smiled gratefully. In me solidified the decision to keep Cynthia. While her appearance was a real drama, but this one could even spice up a little. Alice was this the right one, but for now sinking in endless heartache.

After her dismissal brought Jasper, this was so angry that he threw them on edge from the club. Their belongings were sent to her home and she did not see him again since then.

Rose fared no better. She received after leaving a letter from Emmett, in which he apologized for it to have so harassed. He would leave them in peace now, and wished her well. Rose acted as if it was the right thing, but his quick powerful task gnawed at her and she put the night together in doubt. Apparently it was none of us lucky enough to find the man for life!

We would meet this evening at my house in order to take care of the only decent beings on the planet. Danny! Then, when he slept, we would see love schmaltz, pure pot loads of chocolate in us and accuse each other our suffering. That was the best cure for heartbreak, it was. Cynthia came in the meantime, is back for a fully loaded tray and saw me behind the bar.

"Good morning, Miss Swan," she said kindly.

"Tell Bella to me, all do that," I told her determined. I did not like to be called by my last name, it reminded me too much of my Dad. Another man in my life, let me down when I had desperately needed help.

"Cynthia, your trial period is tomorrow to an end, but I will not let simmer longer. I would appreciate it if you would join our team permanently. Come to my office when the second layer begins, then we do the work contract amendment. He is limited in time only for one year, then we'll see. "

" Oh, Miss ... sorry, Bella, "she said over the moon," you do not feel like I'm happy about this opportunity. All I have always written off and ridiculed. They are the first to give me the opportunity to prove that I can work hard. Thank you! "

" It's okay, "I said, somewhat embarrassed," you have done good work and have earned this chance. "

In this second George came through the door and I went with a beaming smile on him. Since he had offered his "mom" Bertha the end, he blossomed and became more confident. He was still a dream guy, but he now looked really passable and put a whole new confidence to the day.

"Bella, nice to see you. Gets a poor bachelor, nor a breakfast or am I too late. "

" For you there is always breakfast. I will send you Cynthia, who can then take your order "I smiled. had a few weeks ago he such a sentence of life not yet brought out.

"Okidoki", he grinned and sat down at his favorite window seat. Okay, we had to work on his vocabulary yet. "Okidoki" was not a word that provoked passionate feelings for women. I sighed and said Cyn decision that was contrary to his order. I went behind the counter or by an order list and finally looked like she tripped and toppled Georges coffee on his pants.

I hit my hand over her mouth to muffle my laughter when I saw a distraught Cynthia knelt before him and establish himself at the front of his pants made.

"What do you do there? "George squealed in horror and tried to push away. But she stood firm, and rubbed with a cloth around on to his front, which only led to the spot being incorporated into the fabric really nice. When she finally realized she stopped and looked up at him. Only now she looked at George, so it was red all over. He was pretty pissed by the fact that his pants were ruined and did not notice how Cyns glorified view.

Poor thing, I thought. Just a few weeks ago, when he himself looked like a scarecrow, they would have possibly had another chance, but now ... ..

"Let You, "he said angrily," They only rub even more. "

She stood up and apologized a thousand times for their misfortune.

"It's okay, do not make a drama out of it, I also do not do it," he then said something friendly.

was fatally embarrassed them to me and looked at me guiltily.

"I'm sorry, Miss Bella," she said guiltily, "I did not really."

"I know that yet," I said gently, "George is a good friend of mine and I know that he will not take you more crooked. "

"George!" Repeated dreamily them, "What a beautiful name." You dear little

, she was completely blown away by it. Unfortunately, this did not seem to be reciprocal, because George devoted his full attention of the newspaper and looked at not even when she set a new coffee on his table. Sadly, they ran to the next guest and gave him time and again longing glances. What was just going with the guys? I am beginning to believe that the dinner was bewitched, as all women who worked in it, had bad luck with men.

evening came Alice and Rosalie and memory were playing with my son while I prepared the food. They lost mercilessly as children had a much better memory. While Alice and Rose got enormous difficulties the cards assigned to Danny made it easy and won hands down. He proudly boasted of his victory over the adults and I drove him proud of the hair.

The food was in a cheerful atmosphere, as my son brought it all finished with his jokes to entertain. When Danny was in bed later, we made ourselves comfortable in front of the television and were discussing what movie we should see. We decided on "Ps I love you, "a film that brought us all to cry vigorously. The chocolate bars and the Kleenex box on the table quickly shrank concern. It was a total chick flick and so romantic and sad at the same time that we broke all barriers. Now really missing is Bibi, but was visiting her children and would only come back in two days.

"Oh god, was sad," Rose said being addressed and that wiped a tear from the corner of my eye. Alice blows his nose and sniffed too loudly into her handkerchief and nodded affirmatively.

"Girls, before we do that the next film, I see my favorite gossip show. It begins in five minutes. "

She was always very excited when the celebrities on strolled the red carpet and looked longingly beautiful evening clothes she wore. For a short time they kidnapped this program in a different world and they spent the whole week obnoxious when they missed a show.

"Then we'll look at me, do what the rich and famous like that," I said good-naturedly, and Alice was expressed almost flattened his nose to the unit, so close they drew near.

"Hey!" Complained Rose, "You are not invisible, kindly sit down a bit to the rear.

Alice grinned sheepishly and moved slightly to the rear, the end we were like chickens on the sofa stared at the screen while we made a bag of gummy bears an end. It was shown a report on a charity gala, which took place three days ago here in Seattle.

"This is the Gala, has spoken of the Emmett's mother on the phone," Rose whispered softly.

Now I also saw attentively, although I am not usually interested in something. Shortly after announcing the reporter, that would be sent after the commercial break an interview on the influential family of Cullen, who was one of the main sponsors of this event.

I was sitting on pins and needles, until the commercial break was over and began the interview. I had almost The jelly babies stuck in my throat when I saw that the entire Cullen clan was represented, including Edward and Jessica. Since it was a recording that was recorded three days ago, as explained at the beginning of the program, it said in plain text only, that Edward was already some time back and had not been reported. Apparently he took his promise seriously and avoided me where he could.

Even on television, he just looked good and the only elegant tuxedo made him look extremely attractive. His tousled hair was back to that particular way in which it was only his own and his green eyes looked through the screen just as hypnotic as in kind, incredible desire spread through me and I almost lost the text, when I heard the following exchange between him and the reporter.

"Mr. Cullen, "she said, very professional," Let's start with you! How did your spokesperson announced, you are close to the wedding with Jessica Stanley. As it stands just next to you, so this seems to also correspond to the truth. Would you like to comment for our viewers? "

Edward smiled charmingly and Jessica moved close to his side, kissed her lightly on the lips, which she drew a silly grin and answered the question.

"That's right. Me and my fiancee are magical soon marry. In fact, it's been in eight weeks so far and we are both very happy, is not it, dear. "

This last word to me the death blow. Love! He called it the way he always addressed me as if it was nothing special to him. It was nothing special, I realized. He had me made it clear that he did not love me, yes, was not even in love with me. He wanted my body craved and then my resistance to break, but he felt nothing for me. What more evidence do I need for as yet, to understand at last? He looked through the camera directly into my eyes as if he knew at that moment that I would see this post. His silence in recent days was a sign of the end. He had given up and let me go. I had no illusions that his hypocritical declaration of love for Jessica was true. He would sooner or cheat with other women and driving his little games with other women. I did not notice that I was crying until Alice tender arms around me.

"Bella, do not cry that he is not worth it," she said sympathetically, and turned the TV off. We had seen enough.

"I ... I .... I .... ... Wei knows it," sobbed I stammered, "but it .... It doing .... so ... hurt.. "

I let myself from my friends console. The whole of the last time I had been so strong, no sooner had shed a tear and I plunged into the work. Now I knew why. I had not yet been completed internally with Edward, but still very deep in me hoped that it would change your mind and Jessica drove to the devil. Tanya could not forget that he was aware she was dead but his feelings had died with her, but I imagined that one day revive them with patience. Until then, I had enough love for both of us.

"I'm such a silly sheep," I cried and wiped defiantly the tears from his cheek, "When will I finally grow up and see one that I'm better off without man answered. You have done all I only hurt myself and a sucker. First Jake, as he let me sit pregnant, then Dad, who refused to give me any help and pull me all alone to Seattle did, although I only eighteen and pregnant. And now, I fell to the next. "

Rose looked at me sympathetically, but nevertheless got a little criticism.

"I can understand you, Bella. Your anger, your frustration, but what this relates to Edward, you are not completely innocent. You have irritated him to the death, with no intention to yield to him. I be assisted up and I deeply regret now, because I actually thought that it could very well work out for you. But I'm probably mistaken. Excuse me! "

" You need not apologize to you, Rose. I am an adult and knew what I do. I get angry just because I believed that what he feels for me. "

The evening was spoiled, and even sweets I could not cheer. Alice and Rose were also sad and I hated myself that I ruined their evening. I spent the night sleepless and thinking of the man who had stolen my heart, without having to use for that.

Benton was the first person I saw the next morning when I walked into the diner. It was still early and he was sitting on a stack of files and checked my accounts.

"How long has he been back?" I asked him. He took his glasses

from the nose and wiped it cumbersome, before he answered.

"For a week," he replied in short supply.

I laughed bitterly.

"And he has not seen fit to come forward?" I asked sharply. I knew I was wrong, but I had to go somewhere with my anger and poor Benton, was now even there.

"It I'm really sorry, but he insisted that you know nothing about it for now. "

" I must speak to him, "called me and cursed me in the same second that. Was I mad? Everything would start all over again. Even if he did not love me, he could hardly keep his hands off me. See him again bordered on self-destruction.

"I'm sorry," he repeated, "but he wants no contact with you."

It was like a slap in the face. I sat down very slowly to the first available chair and bowed his head.

"You must think me a silly goose." Whispered I quietly and ashamed.

"No, Bella," he said softly, "I believe it is a very charming, warm-hearted person. I know I listen to me like a broken record player, if I repeat constantly, how sorry I all for you doing, I Edward've known since he was in diapers and have a lot of his decisions, whether business or pleasure approved. But this time he probably makes the biggest mistake of his life with the marriage. But he is not dissuade. I personally believe that you would have been a better choice. He needs someone to penetrate his cold tanks and distract him from his grief by Tanya. They were already so close. "

" Did you know her? "

" Yes, and I must say it was really quite a lovely person. He loved her and rightly so. "

His words cut me to the heart, because to admit I did not want them out of their unusual beauty, was also a good person. How should one come close to such an ideal
.
"How long is this thing come from?" I asked curiously. I knew so little about Edward knew, not even his age.

"He was twenty when Miss Tanya died, is now eight years ago."

"Eight years!" Said I hit, "So long already! I thought it would be much more likely to have been. "

Eight years had elapsed between the time and he could not forget them.

"I know what you're thinking, and I regret to pass legislation. He loves her still on his bedside table, he still has any picture of her. He visits her grave once a week, when he is in Seattle and turns it so the honor. He once said, he would feel close to her. "

I gulped. He would never stop loving them.

"Thank you for your honesty, although I still do not understand why he is now so extremely cool responded, but I will probably never make sense of Edward. "

" You are too close to him and scares him to death. Do not get me wrong. He is not in love with you, but you can not even cold. He's probably very confused and is speeding up the wedding. Originally it was planned only in half a year, but he can bring forward the date. "

tired I got up.

"Then so be it," I said firmly, "We should go to work, or he fired me yet and I'm sitting on the street," I concluded sarcastically. The day passed quietly

and uneventful. Alice and Rose felt the strange Mood in which I was, but they left me alone. After a long day, I arrived home and was looking forward to Danny, any nonsense on television and one last swim. I also took the post up and looked through them while I slowly climbed the steps. In an envelope, I stopped, pulled it hastily and read the contents. Full Entsezten fall I had the sheet. My worst nightmare came true!

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